Dogman University

Dogman University Tee: A Souvenir from the Innerverse

By Dr. Ritz Footwat, Explorer Extraordinaire and Chronicler of Cryptid Cultures

Ah, the Dogmen. An enigmatic and endlessly fascinating species of the Innerverse. While often dismissed as little more than brutish relics of some forgotten evolutionary branch, I’ve found them to be far more complex than the tales told around campfires would suggest. Dogmen are, in fact, the second-most intelligent of all canid species. Naturally, this distinction excludes the infamous Coyote (the two-legged one), whose cunning intellect is legendary. But Dogmen, for all their primitive, Spartan ways, carry their intelligence with an arrogance so palpable it might as well be weaponized.

It was during a particularly tense expedition into the Dogman territories of Utharwerld that I encountered their pride and joy: Dogman University. Yes, you heard that right—a functioning university, complete with lecture halls, an athletic program (don’t ask what they use for balls), and a disturbingly well-stocked library. It seems that while Dogmen may only be marginally more intelligent than a wild chimp gifted with the power of speech, they’ve managed to harness their literacy into a cultural cornerstone.

Make no mistake—Dogmen are primitive by most standards, the Klingons of the cryptid world. They live for combat, thrive on aggression, and consider a day without a duel to be a day wasted. Yet, they are also deeply, arrogantly proud of their ability to read, rubbing it in the faces of every creature they encounter. Their texts are mostly manuals for weapons and strategy, but try telling them that—they’ll insist they’re the intellectual elite of the Innerverse.

This T-shirt, a souvenir from my journey, celebrates the indomitable spirit of Dogman University. Featuring their proud emblem and bold lettering, it’s not just a shirt—it’s a badge of honor for anyone daring enough to appreciate the raw, untamed brilliance of the Dogmen. Wear it proudly and let the world know you’ve brushed shoulders with the Klingons of cryptid culture.

Order your Dogman University T-shirt today and join the ranks of those who dare to embrace the cryptid unknown.

Key Features:

• Premium, breathable cotton for comfort on expeditions.
• Bold design showcasing the Dogman University logo.
• Perfect for cryptid enthusiasts, adventurers, and fans of the Innerverse.

Dogmen may be arrogant, but even they would admire your good taste. Get your Dogman University tee today—before they decide they invented it and claim it as their own.